My Witness Is The Empty Sky

The Worst Names I’ve Ever Heard

Monday
Mar 17,2008

As I mentioned I am expecting and I am extremely excited.  As a normal ritual everybody is a now going gaga over what the name of the child should be.   The question is what’s the deal with naming a baby?

A person’s name is very important.  For one, a person will have to carry his name for the rest of his life.  He will be called by it by the whole world – his friends, his officemates, his boss, his family, etc.    It is representative of who he is.  He will be branded by this name forever.

According to some friends of mine who are into New Age spirituality, a name resonates your spiritual being which reflects itself into your very personality and as people call your name they constantly reaffirm who you are by echoing your very being by saying your name.  Ok that’s too deep and too much responsibility for me.  However, this does make sense… a bit.

Nevertheless, as skeptical as I may seem I do know that naming a child should not be taken lightly.  However, there is the other argument.  My other friends believe that I should have fun with naming my child since my own mother gave me a really odd name. I have lived with people telling that my name is nothing more than a derivative of the song “My Sharona.”  They believe that my mom must’ve had a cold on that day and my name instead of being Sharona became Mairona.

Honestly, why in God’s name do I want to be called Sharona?

Okay, since I want to have a bit of fun, instead of asking you people what would be the best name to name my child, I will ask you the names I should avoid.  What do you think is the worst and most stupid names ever?

The names that I’m about to list down are names of people that I know.  I constantly wonder why they were named in such a manner.  Here it goes:

1.       Vector – Apparently, his parents are both physicists and they wanted to name their children with words in physics and Vector was perfect as it will sound as if it were a derivative of Vector.
2.       Macho – Calling your child Macho and him turning out to be gay is just WRONG!!!
3.       Super – I actually talked to the father of my friend Super just to ask him why Super?  I wonder can you guess what’s Super about Super? LOL!
4.       Names of Countries or Places i.e. China, Alaska, America - These are the most uncreative names ever.  it doesn’t even mean anything apart from being a country.  You know what?  If you can’t think of  a name for your child buy a Baby Names book.  Better yet, just google it.
5.       Rabbi – Most names have either a biblical, mythical or religious origin.  However, rabbi is more or a title than anything else.  I mean, if you’re going to name your child rabbi, why not priest or monk or even dalai lama? I once shouted the name of my friend “Hey Rabbi!” and a Jewish guy actually thought he really was a rabbi and wanted some advice.  I mean, REALLY!!!

Now I know that these names are not the most outrageous names yet and I really want to know what the most stupid names are that exist in this world.

Now there’s a site called I beat you and I want to invite you to a contest as to who can come up with the most stupid name ever.  What’s nice about it is that we don’t have to contain this contest amongst ourselves.  For a more objective point of view other people can vote as to what the most stupid name has ever been given to a person.  So are you game?  Let’s see if I can beat you to the most stupid name ever.

How Exciting!!

Tuesday
Mar 11,2008

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